schnoodle: (Default)
As I've said before my wife has with everything that's going on has said she's happy if I met some lady just for sex, I've not been actively seeking but I do have a profile that says something a long the lines of looking for social meets and lets see what happens, so really if nothing else someone to talk too.
Seems to be impossible to find anyone though all the women/couples seem so picky for example:
"...needs a filter button for HUNG, 6 PACK and NO BEARDS"
The only people I do seem to be attracting is men, I'm not gay and if any do write to me I'm polite but as I say it's probably a good thing. I don't think I'd really know what to do if I actually got any genuine offers but I do get frustrated as it seems all ok for a horny wife who can't get enough cock or couples looking to spice up their love life. I saw a message on the site from some woman saying she only got 290 messages and didn't feel she was getting the attention she deserved. I thought I don't get any messages and I haven't had any couples or ladies look at my profile. Maybe I haven't really been trying but then again I do feel there's a kinda double standard and level of expectations from the women on there. Actually most daying site are like that now I think about it.

I don't even know why I'm really on there probably just want some attention and distraction from what's happening.
schnoodle: (Default)
I'm going to express myself on here as there's no judgement. I'm so sexual frustrated ATM, understandably our sex life as pretty died what with emotions and treatments, especially my wife on hormone therapy. It's all a bit messed up, she's said she wants me to enjoy myself and if I get the opportunity I should take it but she understandably doesn't want to know. I love my wife so I have mixed feelings, I don't want to add to what is a terrible situation. I have tried chatting on the swingers site we're a member of but as soon as ladies or couples find out it's just me the conversation just stops. I added to the profile she won't meet anyone due to medical reasons and it's just me, clearly they don't read the profile. The sad thing is ATM, I'm like just to chat or have a social meeting with some of these people, I'm not cheating just exploring. I do wonder if I was a woman the conversations would be very different, there are so many expectations as a man, therefore I'm useless if I'm not part of a couple. There either women looking to explore their lesbian/bi side or wanting a 3 some with husband/boyfriend and don't want a bloke or they say you're married so not interested. If I was a married woman I don't think they'd be a problem, I'd just be liberated and sexually open mind. As a man I'm a pervert who's only interested in one thing.
The thing is I don't know I could do it anyway which is why I just want to talk more than anything, I know it's only really fantasy and I realise that I'm just trying to escape my reality. The idea of sitting in a pub talking about sex lifes and meeting new people sounds exciting but again I don't know what I'm torturing myself. Human nature I suppose, sure I watch porn when I can and knock one out but it's not the same. I just feel like a teenager again who's not getting any, when everyone else's saying they are.
Cancer is such a bastard thing it effects your lif in so many ways and it's like people just expect your life to just stop. The fact that you're human and still have the same feelings and urges as everyone else and just aren't able to just makes things more frustrating.
Again it's just fantasy vs reality.


schnoodle: (Default)

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